For the first time in 10 years I don’t want to die. This isn't perfect. It's normal to always think about somebody, to associate happiness with them, etc. Obsessive love disorder is a mental disorder that causes a person to obsess about the object of their love or affection. It is amazing when the man in your life is everything that you have been dreaming of and that he gives you all of his love and support. She was able to snap me out of minor mental breakdowns and panic attacks that I was having. Claims about the efficacy of any treatment or self-help strategy, In response to someone who's asked for help, it's okay to. Tweet. They usually turn out to be tough but cynical loners, who hide a soft and insecure mind under a tough exterior. Love addiction can become sex addiction and if it remains untreated it can lead to drug abuse and alcohol addiction. Sorry if I gave you more than one direction you could possibly go here. It is important to ensure that you know the ins and outs of the situation yourself and if required, consult someone professional who would be able to guide you through the recovery process. Honestly I just want to get my life back on track. Also, I agree with you that I should just ask her for the truth and to be as blunt about what she wants from me as she needs to. Counseling can help and may involve helping both people visualize their relationship in a healthier manner, as well as using affirmations and other techniques to enhance their self-esteem. use the following search parameters to narrow your results: FYI, it's usually more helpful to post anything that specifically involves suicidal thoughts or intent in /r/SuicideWatch. And poor living conditions, inability to get stable work. It's refreshing to get some sound advice from a third party that isn't involved with the situation. It seems like any progress I make in improving my own life, I find some way to sabotage it, like I'm addicted to depression. leaving him with self harm issues, a suicide attempt and a 11 drinks a night alcohol issue.Now...I am in a relationship again, I HAD been doing my best to not be obsessive with my stalking of this partner, or as abusive towards their friends, I had 4 slips in past 5 years I have known her. She is also stunningly beautiful and has a great personality and sense of humor. Love addiction is treated with the help of sex addiction treatment methods so you must consult a mental health professional like psychiatrist or psychologist for further evaluation. Press question mark to learn the rest of the keyboard shortcuts. I got her to hang out with me again and we had a really good time. It's probably best that you create distance from this girl so that you're able to move on. So I suppose, not having the options or want to socialize with people who I will likely leave behind in 2 or so years is part of it. This really gave me a lot to think about. 3 Stages of Obsession. This is the first time that I've heard of OLD, and while I've never really experienced that, I can be clingy/needy in relationships. Or should I just cut ties with her and stop trying to talk to her? Sometimes I wonder if my feelings for her are real or imagined, then I think, "Either way, they are thoughts that I'm having, so that makes them real. I started getting little bursts of happiness every time I heard from her. That is when I'm happiest. If they're really such the ideal person for you, if you have similar interests and life experiences and you're two people who should absolutely spend your futures together, she'll be able to see that too. I became somewhat addicted to the sound of notifications on my phone because I always hoped it would be something from her. Laissez notre lingerie sensuelle et sexy vous transporter et faire de vos rêves et vos fantasmes une réalité ! In her book Love and Limerence: The Experience of Being in Love, psychologist Dorothy Tennov describes limerence. Remind them constantly that they are loved and cared for. And all the time, with every new thing I learn about her, my love for her increases. The overall range of ways to treat obsessive love disorder is completely on how you handle the situations. When she stopped responding again, I slipped again. I know that she is not interested in being anything more than friends with me, and instead of just accepting that, I keep getting my hopes up that things might work out the way I want them to. On the whole, I think one of my biggest problems is that I think way too much. Due to … TL;DR: There's a girl that I'm completely obsessed with and this obsession is unhealthy for me. That got me to start opening up to her a lot and sharing my dark thoughts and experiences. Dealing with Obsessive Love Disorder. Then, in a long period of silence, I felt myself slipping back into depression, thoughts of self-hatred and self-harm started to take over and I started sending her increasingly dark and disturbing messages, just trying to get a response. Despite efforts to ignore or get rid of bothersome thoughts or urges, they keep coming back… Please do your own research before making any online purchase. I wanted to talk to her about my feelings toward her, but I couldn't find the words. I'm not even attracted to other girls. Part of declaring that somebody is perfect should include that they want you just as badly. Number one on your list for characteristics of somebody that you're going to call perfect should be that they have mutual feelings for you. I think both of you are probably contributing to how uncertain this feels. I've done a little reading, trying to find ways to help myself and came across obsessive love disorder: https://www.healthline.com/health/obsessive-love-disorder#symptoms They become the ones who chase them, ghost them, suffocate them. I understand that you feel very attached to her, and that she helped you through a lot, but if she's being cold and unresponsive, it's a good indicator that she might not be feeling the same way as you. But there are people who can easily get obsessed with their partner and turn their love into obsessive love. So easier to manipulate and coerce to my rules, or so I thought. With that said maybe the only thing you could do would be to ask her for that clarification and give her to reassurance that you really want to hear the truth and that it'll be better for you both if she tells you, and that you aren't going to harm yourself or go off the deep end if she isn't interested. Eventually, I felt good enough about myself to get back on social media and start talking to people again. Obsessive-compulsive personality disorder (OCPD) is a personality disorder that is characterised by extreme perfectionism, order, and neatness. Use of this site constitutes acceptance of our User Agreement and Privacy Policy. I have never been open with anyone about my depression with anyone as much as her and she is profoundly important to me. Limerence Defined. The symptoms of relationship-centered obsessive-compulsive disorder, or ROCD, may also amplify those very normal doubts and fears and lead to relationships crippled by dysfunction and distress 2,3. If rejected, they might hurt or even kill themselves. I never know the right things to say, because my feelings for her are extremely deep and complex and get in the way of what I want to say. I had a certain color LED set on my phone for when the message was from her and I was always so happy when I would see it blink. Get over my self imposed rules and my jealousy. It can mean telling them where to go, what to do, what to eat, etc. Some victims of this disorder face obsessive love disorder. Antidepressants and anti psychotics made me worse and more violent if anything. Reddit. Obeying rituals, such as going through a doorway in a particular way, touching objects a certain amount of times and join one of thousands of communities. People who have developed other attachment disorders as a result of abuse or neglect may be more prone to develop love disorders instead of healthy relationships. 2 thoughts on “Signs of Obsession: 14 Signs of Obsessive Love You Can’t Ignore” Typy Metali says: February 8, 2021 at 3:00 am Zycie to zagadka, nie trac czasu, bo jej nie rozwiazesz. This mental picture and the dreams I have sometimes are so tantalizing, that I simply can't resist letting my mind wander and get lost in their pleasantness. I can't keep hurting myself over this anymore, but I simply can't get her out of my head. As most people tend to tell me to get over it. Obsessive Love Disorder, or OLD, is a condition in which a person becomes obsessed with another individual who they believe they are in love with. They are the ones who are vulnerable to an obsessive love disorder. E.g. basic info. Please don't diagnose others or advocate for or against specific treatments or self-help strategies. Obsessive love is based on fantasy and illusion. You could try to get to the core of this by encouraging her that it's safe to be clear with you in regards to does she want to hang out anymore, does she still enjoy talking, etc. When I started talking to this girl it started off as just casual chit chat. It's funny when people say that while at the same time outlining a situation that clearly doesn't describe somebody who is perfect for them. If you just want her off your mind and you want this to stop, you simply need to let it go for a while, don't initiate contact, go through the withdrawals, remind yourself why it wasn't good for you, and keep on moving forward, just like somebody trying to break any other addiction.